Thursday, February 20, 2014

Walk by faith not by sight...

So much seems to happen in our lives between each blog post. I guess it's because I go 2 months without posting now. I would tell you I will do better but I'm not going to lie. Our lives are crazy busy right now and plans change every day around here. I have tried to quit planning because every time I do God changes them...when will I learn :) Our adoption journey is...what's the right word...umm...kind of changing?!? Wae and I decided we wanted to take ourselves out of the planning. We decided "word of mouth" was going to be the route we would go for now. You know so we had no control over the situation. Ok...I will be honest. It's so I don't control the situation. We all know Wae isn't doing the controlling here. He is seriously patiently waiting for God to lead us instead of us trying to lead God. We have told a few OB/GYN doctors and nurses that we are interested in adoption. We have told all of our families and friends and I have obviously told our blogging world family as well. We have been praying with full faith that God would lead us to our baby through this method. I have made a book on shutterfly telling our story which shows our family life before Ian, during Ian, and after Ian. It explains the many ways God has called us to adoption and we plan to give those to a few doctors. Is this the route I originally told God I was willing to pursue? (insert laughter here)No it's not! However, this is where we feel like we are supposed to be going right now. I am not going to give all the details of our adoption journey right now. God is leading us in a way that is far too big for me to type on this blog. He is connecting us to people who only He could connect us with. He has given us a vision...the vision is being refined not changed. He is simply adjusting it to His will for our lives. We are totally following His lead right now and the only way I can describe it is that we are walking by faith and not by sight. It is as if there are hundreds of people praying for this God ordained vision we have and God is listening. He is answering and He is leading Wae and I down the path He has laid out for us. It is not what I originally visioned. It is actually terrifying just to be honest. However, something amazing is happening. Something that can come only from God. Wae and I are at such peace with the direction we are headed. We are so happy and honored that God is trusting us enough to allow us to be a part of a much bigger plan than we had dreamed. From the beginning of this new path we started my prayer has been that God would give Wae and I the same convictions...that we would always be on the same page. I read in a book that visions thrive in an environment of unity and die in an environment of division. I know if we don't stay on the same page that this is not the path for us. It's crazy how "together" we are right now. So you might be asking yourself...why is she sharing this but not telling us all the details?!? I just can't right now. But I shared because I believe many of you have prayed for us for years. I believe many of your prayers were answered and that's why Wae and I have our healthy little boy Asher. I believe you all love our family and have prayed without ceasing. We need your prayers now again...This path is so new and we just don't know where it will go. There are so many options and we need you to pray for discernment, unity, love, understanding, and I know you aren't supposed to pray for patience so be creative on that one. I need patience right now though :) We are walking by faith and not by sight and I pray God helps me each morning to continue walking by faith. The devil easily knows how to distract me and is trying to sidetrack this God ordained vision. I need prayer to remain focused on the path set before me. I don't know where we are going...I don't know if it's a "Maggie" we will be getting. Maybe it's Maggie or maybe it's another fun little boy. Maybe it's an option far from a new baby girl or baby boy. Maybe our "adoption" vision is larger than what we saw as adoption in the past. Thank you for your prayers. I believe they are one reason we are where we are today. Now a little update on Asher...he's a mess y'all. His favorite sayings are "4..5..6" (I have no idea why) If you say anything about time he says "10 minutes" in the sweetest voice you've ever heard. He calls himself a cowboy and a donkeyhead thanks to his pops! He loves to pray "God our father praise Jesus!" He lists 300 prayer requests at night and prays for them all. He had his first injury...he fell on the edge of the rock fireplace and it immediately started gushing blood right above his eye. He had to have that glued up. Mommy I panicked and totally freaked out! He loves to hug, kiss, and snuggle and yes he uses all those words. He comes to me and says "Rock the baby mommy!" And yes I drop everything and rock the baby. He says "Hold you mommy. Hold you!" This means he wants me to pick him up. He's a momma's boy and I love it!!! He has about 6 girlfriends already and is only 2 1/2 years old. I'm a little worried about this. He had a date for Valentine's this year :) He has the sweetest heart...if he thinks he did something wrong he says I sorry mommy I sorry! He is not all good all the time though...he is a ball of energy and he wears me down somedays. He never stops and talks 24/7. Half the time you have no clue what he's saying but you better figure something out b/c he won't stop until you recognize him :) He unfolds all the laundry I fold and laughs every time. He laughs a lot, he loves big, and he snuggles tighter than anyone I know. He's my heart! I love him with all I have and I"m so thankful he's mine. Photobucket

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